English Facebook Status

Best Funny Quotes for Facebook Status Updates

If you are reading this, congrats you know how to read..

Facebook is like a fridge. When you’re bored you keep opening and closing it every few minutes to see if there’s anything good in it

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.

The zoo is a pretty safe place to fart.

I’m not getting older, I’m just becoming a classic..

I’m not 40, I’m eighteen with 22 years experience…

I may be old enough to know better, but I am STILL young enough to DO IT..

My life, My choices, My mistakes, My lessons, Not your business.

That awkward moment when somebody is doing dishes and you slowly put another dish in the sink.

Doctors finally figured out whats wrong with a boys brain; on the left side, there’s nothing right; and on the right side, there’s nothing left…

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